About a year ago we started to potty-train O. He was 2 years old, showing mild interest, and the other moms in our playgroup were talking about it, so I figured it must be time. I hate to get into anything without knowing what to expect, so I jumped online and read every article and blog post I could find on the big PT. I studied up on the "3-Day Method" that comes up on Pinterest all the time and decided that with my obsessive compulsive nature, having a toddler leave little puddles all over the floor for 3 days wasn't gonna fly. I read some other methods and wasn't entirely convinced they were a good fit for us either. I decided to come up with my own method. Of course, because after years of mothers teaching their children how to use the bathroom I was going to come up with something that worked so much better... or something. Right.
He'd had a potty for awhile and he loved it. We picked it up at his first sign of interest, which was, of course, a little early. I love it's versatility though and would recommend it to anyone. It can be used as a little potty chair, the seat can be removed and used as a potty seat on the big toilet, or the lid can be closed and it can be used as a stool.
I made a little chart for him to put stickers on and we got started. I decided that I would have him stay in his diaper until he actually went in the potty a certain number of times, then we would help him pick out some underwear and go from there. I watched him closely and he did get on the potty a couple times throughout the week, so we progressed to the next step and he picked out some underwear. I don't know that I've ever cleaned up so many accidents as that first day in underwear. I didn't dare take him anywhere in them or let him sleep in them, so we were always changing in and out of diapers and underwear. All the veteran moms are now shaking their heads and saying, "Yeah, that was never going to work." I figured this out pretty quick and decided he just wasn't ready.
I made a little chart for him to put stickers on and we got started. I decided that I would have him stay in his diaper until he actually went in the potty a certain number of times, then we would help him pick out some underwear and go from there. I watched him closely and he did get on the potty a couple times throughout the week, so we progressed to the next step and he picked out some underwear. I don't know that I've ever cleaned up so many accidents as that first day in underwear. I didn't dare take him anywhere in them or let him sleep in them, so we were always changing in and out of diapers and underwear. All the veteran moms are now shaking their heads and saying, "Yeah, that was never going to work." I figured this out pretty quick and decided he just wasn't ready.
I decided to wait a couple months until he was a little older and more ready. Meanwhile, we found out we were expecting, so now the pressure was on. I was determined not to have two kids in diapers, because that would be the end of the world, right? Hah! I put aside my fastidious nature in the interest of conquering this potty training mountain and decided we would try the "3-Day Method." After all, I could put up with a little urine everywhere for 3 days, right? At first things were great and I thought it was working. We had quite a few accidents, but also quite a few successes. I was almost considering calling us potty trained when I realized an important detail of our successes: Me. O wasn't actually deciding when to go to the bathroom, I was reminding him every 30 minutes or so and then dragging him in to the bathroom when it seemed as though it had been long enough. If I left it up to him, I would find him standing in a puddle. I was actually the one who was almost potty trained, not O. So we waited again.
The tricky part about my sweet Little Man was that he didn't care if he was wet or stinky. His diaper could be so full of pee it was hanging between his knees and he would be totally unaware. He could clear a room his stench was so bad and he would still fight you about laying down long enough to change it. He just had better things to do, I guess. A couple months before the baby came we were staying at my mom's house and decided to try again. If anyone could help me potty train this kid, it would surely be her. No cigar, he still was just not ready.
Finally, a couple weeks shy of his 3rd birthday, he started to admit to us when he was stinky and needed to be changed. Hallelujah! We tried potty training one more time before his Dad went back to school and it worked like a dream. Until this point I had decided potty training was the hardest part of parenting, but I changed my mind after he finally started going by himself.
Here he is with his "Potty Prize."
Here are the top 5 lessons I learned through all this:
#5- They need an example. Before we potty trained O, I insisted on my privacy in the bathroom. It was my 5 lone minutes to recollect myself throughout the day and I was not going to give that up! Little ones need an example though, so I had to unlock the door for a couple months while he learned how to use the potty. It really did help him learn and get excited about being like Mom and Dad.
#4- Don't be afraid to use incentives. Do I usually let my toddler chow down on candy regularly or run around covered in temporary tattoos of the Ninja Turtles? No, but if it means he'll be excited to go potty, then by all means have at it. It's only for a week or two and then you can return to the no-candy regimen. Use whatever seems to motivate your toddler. Maybe it's stickers or balloons, awesome, get a bag and they'll get practicing.
#3- Use their want for independence. Toddlers are in that frustrating stage where they want to do things on their own, but just don't seem to be big enough. This is something you want them to be able to do on their own, so play that up! They'll love how "big" they feel when they can go by themselves and get rid of their diapers.
#2- Be excited. No one wants to learn to do something that's boring and mundane, so we have to make it seem exciting. Cheer them on, do a little dance when they finally go, give them a high-five when they remember to use soap. Make it exciting and fun so they'll want to go.
#1- They have to be ready. As my story illustrates, the hardest lesson for me was knowing when he was actually ready. If they're not ready, it's going to be really hard. Sometimes the difference of a couple months is huge. So don't be afraid to wait. So what if they're a little older, everyone learns eventually.
Hopefully, these lessons that took me a year to learn will come in handy for you! Do you have any lessons you learned while potty training your child? Post them in the comments! I'd love to hear them since I'll be going through this again in a few short years!
The tricky part about my sweet Little Man was that he didn't care if he was wet or stinky. His diaper could be so full of pee it was hanging between his knees and he would be totally unaware. He could clear a room his stench was so bad and he would still fight you about laying down long enough to change it. He just had better things to do, I guess. A couple months before the baby came we were staying at my mom's house and decided to try again. If anyone could help me potty train this kid, it would surely be her. No cigar, he still was just not ready.
Finally, a couple weeks shy of his 3rd birthday, he started to admit to us when he was stinky and needed to be changed. Hallelujah! We tried potty training one more time before his Dad went back to school and it worked like a dream. Until this point I had decided potty training was the hardest part of parenting, but I changed my mind after he finally started going by himself.
Here are the top 5 lessons I learned through all this:
#5- They need an example. Before we potty trained O, I insisted on my privacy in the bathroom. It was my 5 lone minutes to recollect myself throughout the day and I was not going to give that up! Little ones need an example though, so I had to unlock the door for a couple months while he learned how to use the potty. It really did help him learn and get excited about being like Mom and Dad.
#4- Don't be afraid to use incentives. Do I usually let my toddler chow down on candy regularly or run around covered in temporary tattoos of the Ninja Turtles? No, but if it means he'll be excited to go potty, then by all means have at it. It's only for a week or two and then you can return to the no-candy regimen. Use whatever seems to motivate your toddler. Maybe it's stickers or balloons, awesome, get a bag and they'll get practicing.
#3- Use their want for independence. Toddlers are in that frustrating stage where they want to do things on their own, but just don't seem to be big enough. This is something you want them to be able to do on their own, so play that up! They'll love how "big" they feel when they can go by themselves and get rid of their diapers.
#2- Be excited. No one wants to learn to do something that's boring and mundane, so we have to make it seem exciting. Cheer them on, do a little dance when they finally go, give them a high-five when they remember to use soap. Make it exciting and fun so they'll want to go.
#1- They have to be ready. As my story illustrates, the hardest lesson for me was knowing when he was actually ready. If they're not ready, it's going to be really hard. Sometimes the difference of a couple months is huge. So don't be afraid to wait. So what if they're a little older, everyone learns eventually.
Hopefully, these lessons that took me a year to learn will come in handy for you! Do you have any lessons you learned while potty training your child? Post them in the comments! I'd love to hear them since I'll be going through this again in a few short years!
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